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Yesterday was the NCC 104 challenge quest... so i didnt go sch. The nite before tat... me went hq frm sch to settle some aero centre stock taking.. den i met daddy latiff outside amoy quee camp, he sent me home den i faster bathe n pack my stuff while he go fetch mumi raps n mr johnny, den we went JB (ya.. johor).. went to city square there.. do some shopping... den me n raps chose dis very nice button shirt for daddy... he tried on den we were like... wa!~ look so young... force him to buy.. hahas!~ After tat we went to some restrauant (chinese halah de).. eat peking duck (very nice ar!) and venison... den used a coupon... end up 4 person eat onli 84rm... cheap sia.. den we continued for some shopping.. me n raps bought the same shirt at giodano.. (same colour some more)... hahas!~ den had a drink n head back to S'pore. Den so stupid... causeway jam.. at tat time some more... had to book in by 2359 at amoy quee. We 1146 den managed to clear all the custom.. den daddy drive very fast sia... speed like wad like tat... 130km/h... overtake here overtake there... so scary. Somemore his eyesight at nite not gd. Den lucky.. jus nice managed to get in on the dot... 2359.. Thk God.. n Thks to Daddy's superior skill of driving... hahas.
So yest... early morning gt up prepare for the challenge quest thingy. I was in the 1st event.. cycling cum MOC.... look easy.. but was damn xiong. I was in Air Team 1... the first runner was zhenghua's male officer.. Tom Ho. Team2 de was also zhenghua officer.. but female.. Angela Tan. We start off being the last 2 teams of all... somemore tat Tom Ho really very the slow. Cycled off first also come in after angela. Lucky my team 2nd runner was SCLT Fauzi. Airbourne de... very fit.. so he managed to overtake team2 and alot others even thou he was the last to set off. Den my turn.. by the time i ran from the parade sq to the 1st MOC already no strength le. den do all the obstacles... at the 6th one... climbing up the rope.. i hang there for quite some time.. no more strength to go up.. after struggling to pass thru all the MOC (total 10)... den run off to cycle.... already abt to drop dead. It seems tat the bike is moving me n nt me moving the bike. Den CLT Yueyun.. managed to overtake me. After half the round of cycling... i almost vomitted my guts out... lucky nv eat breakfast if not sure vomit out de. Den i pressed on... and speeded my way back... immediately fall flat on the grd after i gt back there... had to rest very long... the moment i try to stand up den giddy abt to faint like tat... gt blackout for a moment or 2.... rested very long... den can stand up n walk to mph to find mich they all... ask herto buy 100plus for me... den so much better le...
Coming to the last runner... the Sea team1 gt in first.. den east team2 and west team1... den Air team1 gt in 4th, followed by Airteam2. combined result? 1st is West, 2nd is East, 3rd AIR!!, 4th Sea, 5th Central.
Den the other activities carried on.... Archery, Paintball and Relay Run. Relay Run alot of NV gers runnin... den the AIR was very gd... alot of ppl paced for each other.... encouraging them to run... even my daddy also run wif dunno how many nv gers... of cos nt the fulll 1.5km per person la... but abt 1/3 round like tat.. The overall Results... Air gt 4th... not bad liao... last yr also same result.. but next yr... we are gonna BEAT THE SEA!!! they gt 3rd... also same as last yr..
Oh ya... me also bullied my 'boss'.. CPT Gary cum Comm Air cum Uncle Pek. hahas! He so cute sia... i made him run ard to look for panadol for me... =P.... somemore he also gt Run the 1.5km... i think Air DC is the onli Dc tat ran sia... hahas... Den now... me whole body breaking anytime... coughing n snezing somemore den my stomach will hurt. Even my butt hurt! Later still gt encounter... aiyo.. now headache... think i better go rest rest first....
God was with me @*;
|3:21 PM|
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Just went to read bev's blog.... the 2nd time of the 28th Jan entry... just felt my heart breaks.... my 3 month at yjc... had allowed me to noe dis cute little friend... but now... i'm in poly... she... sufering in yj... n i just cant be wif her.... how i hope the times in S01 nv ends.... not 1S1... not 2S1.. but the times when i'm there wif her.... the S01 times... but i noe... life goes on... n it's already past a yr since tat time... Now i always wonder... is the choice to go SP the correct one? is the choice of leaving yj the correct one?? If i hv continued in yj.... i may h been able to help bev in studies... and we will be promoting together... if i hv continued in yj..... she may not feel so left out now... becos i can totally feel... wad she is going thru... the loneniness... seeing others going to well together and u alone... seeing others counselling someone tat u think is not worth to... hving ur friends tat u think u are so close wif... to jsut look at u in a diff way.... thinking that u belong to them but to them u are not.... all this.... is so familiar to me... or rather... i'm already numb to it...
How i wish i was there when she jst feel so lonely.... so left out... but i cant... becos i too... do not belong there.... i do not belong there anymore.... now i do not even noe if i will still ever remain in their hearts.... will they miss the S01 times just like i do? or will they onli remember 1S1 and 2S1... and think that s01 nv existed?
God was with me @*;
|11:39 PM|
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i've lived for so long... first time... kanna backstab... no bad huh... hahas... so happy. hahas.. it shows tat i'm on a higher ground izzit it? i lead by example... nt by command. I ask my ppl to to move a mountain by moving it first. This is wad i call.. the new age leading.. shouting at everything and corporal punishments no longer work wif this new generation. I'm no humble to take up the post of 2IC n aeromodelling OIC? well he's just jealous. I despise the 48th intake ppl? well he's jsut afraid tat i despise him the same way as he do to me. but y i bother?? A true leader takes backstabs as encouragement, and forgive..
Just like Jesus... who was sent to a place of laws n traditions.. but He came to change things around. He changed the water that is used to wash the surfaces to wine tat bring joy into the body. I strive to lead.. not to command robots wif the traditional ways... but to lead wif example... and to discover new talents. I strive to not make them follow because of rules.. but of the values in their heart. This is then... the true leader of the new generation.
U may think... shouldnt i be angry? well... i wouldnt. i forgive.. n will even pray for him. If i'm nt high enough, he will nt backstab me. If he is tat good, he would hv been given dis job dis task. As the bible says... "Love your enermies"...
God was with me @*;
|1:58 AM|
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aiyooo.... long long time nv update my bloggy liao... as usual la... lazy n busy..
Afternoon me saw mich at northpoint wif haiting... aiyo! both of us miss each other so much... when saw each other le... run over to each other n give a REAL BIG TIGHT HUG!!! Some more it's like... she just smsed me tat early afternoon... aiyo... really really miss her and gt so much to catch up with her. Gd... Friday can see her le..
Currently very busying wif:
- Organising the aeromodelling ex-co... so i will not have to do all the work.. if not can die of overwork n overstress..
- Trying to make a change in the sch training.. Talk some sense into the 48th CLTs, write out a proper role and duties of CLTs, and how sch training should be ran. Train the Part C the relevant skills as a spec.. if not when wait till they turn spec, there will be no more chance.
- Study for coming tests... preparing myself ahead b4 the semester exams comes near...
- Learning and helping my mummy to learn the guitar...
Will nt be updating my blog so often le... from the things tat u see i hv to do.. Hope u all dun mine eh? hehes... look out on my msn nick if i updated...
God was with me @*;
|12:22 AM|
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Phantom of the opera very nice sia! lolx... so masmerising... but hv to watch it wif a correct mind... n reject going to the angel of music cos tat is Lucifer.. the Satan. Somemore watch until 12mn den left the cinema... wanted to watch it at 7pm de... but sold out... den watch the 9.25 one lor... sit the first row somemore... lolx...
Celebrated Roy's bdae just now... after SOL1... den went to PS eat pizza hut.. aiyo... my stomach so full... for the whole day.. till now still very full ar! Den somemore gt cake... of cos all cannt eat liao... den all took a small piece, gave half a cake to some vjc ppl who r having their class gathering there... den they very the cute sia... after we went back to our sit den they sang bdae song to roy.. lolx! so fun sia... they so cute...
Finally God spoke to me.... for i noe tat i've found the one who can simply help me, bring me, and accompany me to move closer to God, to grow more in Him... =)... n God is just simply in the centre...
Happy Birthday to Roy!! Pray that God will use you as a mighty instrument, pray tat u will continue to grow in Him, and grow in your faith. Pray for blessings over u... so u may go forth and bless others! In Jesus name i pray... Amen!
God was with me @*;
|12:13 AM|
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sux ar! last nite hand itchy.... went to try to tighten some parts (but is loose cos of the crack)... den the lens broke. sux lor..
so i went to sch wif my small small eyes.. den went for guitar class wif my small small eyes. lolx! after tat ask roy to pei me go PS to buy new shades. shouldnt have use up tat voucher yest. now can be of use..... look for the new shades for a real long time... see until going blind still cannot find one nice nice de... den i gave up.... frm inext me so 77th street see... den finally found one nice nice de...but haiz... there goes my fifteen bucks frm my bank... jialat... dis month going to eat grass liao... dunno y no money.... how sia... =(..... hopefully next month can start wif a more stable alllowance... if not i'm going to eat grass for one more month... cannot take it liao... see my wallet... onli left 8 bucks for the rest of the month..... see my bank... $310... can onli use until $300... den handphone bill hvnt pay, also include next month's transport. HOW?!!!!!!! wan to cry liao ar....... so stress....... go on diet also no use....
den spend my whole evening at plaza sing lor... shop shop walk walk, chat awhile wif roy's classmates.. very funny ppl. lolx. so tired today.. slpy... going to slp le.... but had fun =)
morning bev also sms me... i miss her so much... miss the times at yj when we study maths and chemistry together.. n phys too. had training together... pon maths tutorials and econs together... now to think tat she's there alone... i just wan to go back to the times at yj... maybe if i had continued to stay in yj... she might be doing better wif the times we study together, explaining to each other. just had tat moment of regret choosing poly... me also wan to wear sch uniform... me dun wan to hv to many many breaks tat is like for hrs... me dun wan to travel for 1 whole hr to sch.. me dun wan to be in a class tat is so boring.. me just wan to be back to the times when i sit at classrooms n lecture theater wif my friends... drawing at each other's notez... have fun, training, and studying together... how i hope i'm at yj now...
my daddi also started his course for 2 days le... now just like me.... go sch listen lecturer talk. hahas. miss him so much...
aiyo... miss so many ppl.... i just wan to give everyone a big hug right now... ='( ...
God was with me @*;
|11:48 PM|
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today me had a gd but lame talk wif gary.. haha! den found out he christian.. but one tat had backslided until the longkang, but still is.. (tat's wad he say.. lolx)....
Den went PS try to use up tat 10 dollar voucher... sia la... so diff to use... cant find anything tat i can use on cos in my mind me also dunno wad i need or wan to buy. Den me use it to buy the nike bottle lor... hahas!
heart feeling kind of... troubled? dunno how to say... dunno wad to do.... dunno who to consult... but just pray tat lord u will come and take over dis life of mine, guide me n lead me to where u wan me to be. But... can i talk to u? u? or u? God hv given me the ans tat he wans me to hold... but i noe... i'm struggling...
God was with me @*;
|11:00 PM|
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today's training... total tragic. before the training... me already assign the CLTs to do the individual things.. the USM can tell me he assign the ppl to do the things liao..
Things tat i felt was the prob to the whole training:
- CLTs not doing wad they are asked to do! The email of their roles was sent to those CLTs coming down... ask them to prepare wad was to be done. End up... can come n tell me... "Intersection games no need CLT to take charge la! Ask a spec to take charge can liao!" Bloody hell... think they so clever... experienced ar?! Onli experienced as Master wad! Big deal! Think u every clever den come take over as DO la! see how u do! End up wad happen?! I need to tellt eh specs wad to do! I need to take charge of the whole intersection games myself and tat guy can jolly well just sit there n do NOTHING n noe NOTHING of wad is going on!
- First thing when the CLTs see the cadets then scold n scold n scold, shout shout shout for God knows wad! Time table was also emailed to them! At 2.45pm.... Can still ask the Part C to do dunno wad fish! Den when i go to him n ask him "Can u let me start my muster parade?!"... den he can still look at me "Start lor"... Den me ask him "Den u still ask the part C to do duno wad?!".... den he still can ask... "I onli give them 2min".... wat the fish! Wad time already n can still do dis thing... Fish off la!~
- Shouldnt the DO have the overall control and authority over the whole training?! I dun feelt at I'm given tat during the whole training. What ever the fish the other CLTs are doing i do not even know! Orders given to ask u to take charge of certain things den u jolly well take charge! Dun think everything the spec will do the spec will do. IF the spec can do everything... den wad the fish are the CLTs for?! Wat ever tat the rest are taking charge of they dun even noe wad the fish is going on wif it! If wat ever the CLTs wan to do can just do and do not have to report to, den can jsut make the DO die off. wat the fish is the DO for when everyone else is doing their own thing?!
- All thinks tat the DO is wad?! Super ar?! Can run one man show. If without all the CLTs around.... making a big mess and giving unneccessary orders around, i think i can do a much better job! All the newly passed out CLTs... think they all every clever... all come back act big only! Pls... DIS IS JUST UR FIRST TRAINING FROM THE DAY YOU PASS OUT OF TAT BLOODY COURSE!! Dun come and act big in front of me... because to me.. u are still just a newly passed out CLT who still noe NOTHING abt the CLT role. Your learning Journey had just began... where as I have already started half a yr ago! Dun think tat a CLT role is just like a spec... let me tell u.. IT IS A TOTALLY 2 DIFFERENT ROLE!! So dun think u have lead more den me when u are a spec... because tat was when YOU ARE A SPEC!! In just half a yr more and i'll be getting my SCLT... where as u will still be a junoir CLT.... so dun need to act big, act clever... because if u think you are... den u can jolly well take over the role as NVAU CLT 2IC and Aeromodelling OIC!!!
The specialist i shall not say much... cos all are still new... but there is really alot of things to induce to them and to teach them and let them noe. But every serious... there is just a problem wif the whole way things work. DO should not be runnig a One Man Show wif the specialist.. and the specialist should also not be the one who is come after-ed by the DO, but to come seek the DO for any doubt. I think the spec are also not told to do all this.. You cant expect someone to just learn to swim the moment u throw him int0 the water rite?! But however... some ppl who are still using floats like t0 pretend as if there are none.
Respect is not earned through shouts n scolds and yelling! Tat is just making them FEAR you n not RESPECT u. Whether the person respect the rank or not... it is their problem because if they dun, u cant do anything abt it either. But to earn respect, is not just to make ppl respect the CLT rank... but to make them respect you for ur doings and ur character. Do not think tat someone who doesnt scold and shout does not earn the respect, but let me tell u... it is those tat need to use shouts n yellings but yet ppl still do wad they are asked to, tat is the true of of respect tat one should earn. N not to make ppl fear u for who u are so tat they will do wad they are asked to... because tat way... no one will try their best to do. no one will help u to do because they dun respect u... because they jsut want to stay away from u....
It is always those tat says they are the best, tat they are the worst.. because there is no humility to allow room for improvement, because they already think tat they are gd enuff and nth needs to be learnt.
I will not blame the specialist the most for dis tragic training... but the CLTs... because the CLTs are told to take care of their own individual role way before time, and it is their responsibility to ensure tat all the part of their prog is well planned and well prepared... if the CLTs are to ensure tat... The training will be running very smoothly wifout the DO needing to run up and down the whole sch!
God was with me @*;
|11:26 PM|
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Haiz... me sick ar... down wif cough n headache plus flu. Didnt go SOL1 on sunday... today also nv go the morning lesson... afternoon went for test but end up test postpone. Den went to see doc... gave me 2 day mc.. but tml cannot dun go GEMS leh... hv to find myself a grp... haiz... but... NO VOICE HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS?! kaoz! jialat liao la......
still thinking wan to postpone tml's guitar class or not... to friday. like tat... den me got LOA for sch... den can go down to nvs for the interview of the Part As. Hahas. See how first lor... now like tat... no voice... tml go guitar class also cannot sing... maybe i should... postpone to Friday nite.. den can pei mummy. hmmm..
Feel so terrible now.. long time no sick liao. now running nose... argh... y my GEMS class like tat de?! Throat so dry... but drink alot of water liao cant drink anymore... getting late also... think me go slp liao...
Miss you alots... : Beverly Sharon DaddiLatiff Michelle........ long long time nv hug ppl liao.... hahas.... just feel like hugging u n u n u... =P
God was with me @*;
|11:58 PM|
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Tired tired... now still working for the cca open hse thingy. Just now was in sch since 12nn, to 11pm ar! first time so late den leave the sch (camps not counted la). Burning n burning VCDs... total 200 to burn... Me, Daddi Latiff n MUmmi Raps burning... me burning the slowest sia. Daddi burning at 48X, mummi using 2 labtops... den me onli one comp at 24X...I no need to slp liao ar...
Now all slp liao... left me onli... still burning... i just hate burning cds..
Nowadays i dun seem to be able to understand mich. I felt tat she just have so much in her mind in her heart tat i do not noe. Cant seem to be able to communicate wif her. Dunno wad's she thinking. Wan to talk to her, also dunno wad to say. Haiz... Mich ar Mich... can u just tell me wad to do? Just miss the old you so much. Many times in life, u will experience alot of things tat u just cant stand and just cant take it. But u just have to persevere, n not just give up. If it's just over some matters and u give up just things tat u wan to do or planned to achieve, you are going to be a failure in life... give up on every little task giving to u. When things are just so hard to pass by n to hang on to, have trust in the Lord, He will bring u through it all. If u just give up, where will God be? Let Him carry you through life...
CCA Open hse... Lord i just pray that u will bless us... Lead ppl towards us Lord.. Give us strength, give us wisdom. For Lord because of 10 righteous, u will spare the city of sinners. So Lord just bless the unit, because of those in here tat are blessed by you Lord. Thank you Lord Father in Heaven... In Jesus Name i Pray... Amen...
Now for Aeromodelling... gt the AOR template liao... gt more work to do le... and also datelines to meet le. But being the OIC, i've really learnt alot. Me, a learner frm experiences n not words. So dis is a really great challenge and learning experience for me. Although it also means more work, I believe so tat dis works will be thru responsibility to be accomplished. Being a CLT now also, I too aim tat the Air cadets will be trained to be a Air Cadet. Knowing things abt the aviations, through greater discipline, receiving greater honour, working wif might, soaring to greater heights, and simply better den the rest. Heard i'll be getting the post of 2IC in NVAU, den once again, more challenges and more learning. gd gd... Cos i wasnt given the chance to learn when i was a spec... everything also same old ppl do, same old ppl learn. alot of things tat i do, many i learnt onli at CLT cos or after tat. So nw i wan to learn fast fast... Aim for Outstanding CLT award. Wanna make a change in the unit, in the air core. But will i be able to do it?? i'll try my best... and i noe the Lord will be there wif me even if i just seem so alone. There are just many many things that u cant learn frm the textbooks. There are just many many things tat u cant attain frm good grades. All dis, i've onli learnt once i became a CLT. The satisfaction i've nt obtained when i was a spec, and now, i'm going all out for it (even thou i noe tat i've tried my best too previously... but i will still continue to strive thru a more different and challenging role and authority now given to me.
Not onli in ncc, but also in cell.. tt i'm growing to be a leader, learning to be a gd leader. Being a leader is really not easy. needing to accomplished a certain task, wanting to build relationship wif those under ur charge, and at the same time hving to earn the respect from them. It is going to take great responsibility, great effort. But many of the times... ppl just dun see it. ppl just dun like the way u work.. some will just simply ignore you and some will just think tat they are better. skills to deal wif all this... i'm slowly trying to learn... but now... many of the times... i'm running away frm it... afraid of failures, afraid of embarassment. The main thing tat i hv to deal wif now... will be my fear....
[Wif big roles and authority comes wif big responsibility and humbleness]
God was with me @*;
|2:57 AM|
MoRe Miie
quiet / introvert
hate to slp
compassionate
loves cute animals like dogs n cats
perfectionist
cant stop learning
crazy aka gaga at times
active outdoor kind
cant live wifout God n alot of u
CaNt LivE w/O eU
daddi latiff
michelle darling
my dear
beverly dear
sharon dear
spiritual family
lord father in heaven
tHiNgs MiEe dO
basketballing
aeromodelling
dancing (trying to learn to)
singing (voice sux)
play guitar (learning)
arms drills n pds
taking neos
shopping wif my dears
gaga over 5566 n sometimes jielun
msning n playing comp games
fEeDinG miee wIf
ice milo
mos's ice milk tea
momo's pearl red tea
blackpearl's bluecoral
teh tarik
pastas
cream of mushroom
binbin rice crackers
DaTes oF miEe n eU
Phoebe Bdae 06.01
LaoPa Bdae 15.01
Roy Bdae 24.01
ChiaLing Bdae 27.02
Daddi Latiff Bdae 23.04
Mummi Raps Bdae 27.05
AhMa Bdae 31.05
Ziyu Bdae 4.06
Daniel Bdae 27.06
Debbie(me) Bdae 7.07
Eugene Bdae 8.07
Received Tongues 11.07.04
AhPa Bdae 12.09
ChinnYee Bdae 24.09
AhPa AhMa wedding 25.09.04
Bev Bdae 18.10
Baptised 30.10.04
Mich Bdae 9.11
Roy received Christ 11.12.04
Mummy's baptism 25.12.04
Mummy's Bdae 27.12
Wish list
A new flip/slide phone
New specs
Shades..
Acoustic Guitar
Hard contact lens
happyhouse planner
White nike cap, small small nike logo de
Nike Jacket
light blue Nike water bottle
new bag for sch
New swimming costume
Jeans!!
Button shirts
Backpack bible
Thumbdrive
miEe DrEaMs
I'm breaking down... too tired to hold up any dreams..
LiNks LinKs
[Take my Quiz (Little u should noe)]
[Faith Community Baptist Church]
[Gospel Com]
[Bible Gateway]
[POSB IBanking]
[North View Squadron]
[National Cadet Corps]
[Air Cadet Monthly]
[Believer Music Initiative]
[Singapore Polytechnic]
[Gmail]
[Friendster]
[Multiply]
[Ringo]
[Maplestory]
[Gunbound]
[o2jam]
[Desktop Display]
[Guitar You]
[48.4FM]
[JieLun]
Our yesterdays.